Where is the Converse?

Sunday, May 2, 2010

I spoke to Melissa today and she told me about a very unusual occurrence that happened on Wednesday, April 28. I mean unusual for most people but not for us because we believe in the powers that our spiritual loved ones are gifted with.

Mornings are hectic at Melissa’s house…Shawn has to catch his bus on time for school, Kyla has to get ready to go to her aunt’s house, and Melissa has to get herself motivated for school. This particular morning, Kyla decides to wear her Converse sneakers but can only find one. The search begins but the mate is no where to be found. Time is ticking, the bus is coming, uncle is waiting patiently downstairs, the pup has to be crated, and Melissa needs to get the two rug rats and herself out the door to start the day.

So what would any fast-thinking mother do to calm her screaming, disappointed daughter? Like all moms would she made a promise to find the sneaker later and pleaded with her child to wear a different pair of shoes. This really isn’t an unreasonable request to make, expecially when the young daughter has a shoe fetish and numerous pairs of shoes to choose from. Finally, out the door they go.

Melissa comes home determined to find the sneaker. She searches unsuccessfully and then she goes to retrieve the one sneaker from the spot in the dining room where she left it. She starts to laugh and then remembers to thank her cousin. There on the floor is not only one sneaker but the mate along side it!

Surprised? We aren’t. We all know how many pairs of sneakers Laura owned (enough pairs to open a small boutique) so she totally identified with Kyla’s disappointment over the lost sneaker. Kyla was Laura’s pride and joy and it just goes to show, she still is. Melissa witnessed another display of Laura’s amazing energy at work.

Why Did Jesus Fold the Napkin?

Why Did Jesus Fold the Napkin?

Why did Jesus fold the linen burial cloth after His resurrection?

I never noticed this....

The Gospel of John (20:7) tells us that the napkin,

which was placed over the face of Jesus,

was not just thrown aside like the grave clothes.

The Bible takes an entire verse to tell us that the napkin

was neatly folded, and was placed at the head of that stony coffin.

Early Sunday morning, while it was still dark,

Mary Magdalene came to the tomb

and found that the stone had been rolled away from the entrance.

She ran and found Simon Peter and the other disciple,

the one whom Jesus loved.

She said, 'They have taken the Lord's body out of the tomb,

and I don't know where they have put him!'

Peter and the other disciple ran to the tomb to see.

The other disciple out ran Peter and got there first.

He stopped and looked in and saw the linen cloth

lying there, but he didn't go in.

Then Simon Peter arrived and went inside.

He also noticed the linen wrappings lying there,

while the cloth that had covered Jesus' head

was folded up and lying to the side.

Was that important? Absolutely!

Is it really significant? Yes!

In order to understand the significance of the folded napkin,

you have to understand a little bit about Hebrew tradition of that day.

The folded napkin had to do with the Master and Servant,

and every Jewish boy knew this tradition.

When the servant set the dinner table for the master,

he made sure that it was exactly the way the master wanted it.

The table was furnished perfectly, and then the servant would wait,

just out of sight, until the master had finished eating,

and the servant would not dare touch that table,

until the master was finished..

Now if the master were done eating, he would rise from the table,

wipe his fingers, his mouth, and clean his beard,

and would wad up that napkin and toss it onto the table.

The servant would then know to clear the table.

For in those days, the wadded napkin meant, "I'm finished..

"But if the master got up from the table,

and folded his napkin, and laid it beside his plate,

the servant would not dare touch the table, because..........

The folded napkin meant,

"I'm coming back!"

Angel Quest--November 8, 2009

One year…one year…it can’t be, but it is. The sun and the moon continued to rise, the waves continued to break along the shore, the seasons came and went. A year without my daughter and life still went on around us. A year without seeing Laura other than in our minds and photos, a year without physically touching her, hugging her…a year spent grieving for Laura and loving her always. We continue to talk to her and I continue to write letters to her hoping that she reads my thoughts. The first year without Laura…the most horrendous, painstaking year of our lives.


I haven't posted anything new in a while (although I do have things to post) because I haven't had the will power to do so until I read tonight's passage from "Healing after Loss" with edits by me:

Deeper and deeper we burrow into our grief. Desolations pile on one another.

We wonder if we shall ever see anything on the horizon

but this gloom and sadness.

Then one day, in some moment of quiet reflection (or in my case a room sitting with my dear friends and 30-40 strangers at a workshop), we find ourselves Thinking of Something Else (or validating our belief)! Is it possible?

Although we may feel alive today, we will move

back and forth many times--back into the deep, dark hole

and out again into light.

After a while we will realize it is all one world, that feelings of joy and sadness enrich each other--as a person who has been mortally ill has a new appreciation for the beauty of starlight, the taste of orange juice,the caress of love.

Is it all right? (Absolutely)

Is it being disloyal to our lost loved one--to savor our life afresh? (Absolutely not.)

Are we in danger of forgetting? (How could we ever?)

Not to worry. We would as soon forget to breathe.

Since Sunday on Laura's first anniversary at the Angel Quest workshop I became determined to be open to the possibility of joy in my life, and I will not be afraid or feel guilty anymore because Laura confirmed for me (witnessed by my friends) that she is happy and surrounded by love and light. She wants me to "pay attention to all the signs she sends me." I will try because on that afternoon I promised her I would and that I would go on living my life.


Angel Quest: http://www.lucelucina.com/

Rainbow

Laura's Sun Glasses

I remember when Laura bought the glasses and when she lost them. She was really upset that she couldn’t find them. After she died, my brother found them in his car and gave them to me. He didn’t know who they belonged to but I recognized them immediately.

I went to the doctor at work for my annual eye exam on Thursday, June 4. The doctor comes once a year and he also offers frames at a discount for the staff’s convenience. I took Laura’s Michael Kors sun glasses with me to inquire about having my prescription put into the frames. The woman who is a total stranger to me asked me to put the glasses on so she could take measurements. I did and she gasped. She said to me that she couldn’t believe it but there was a rainbow going straight across the top of the lens. She was pretty astounded. I wasn’t. I told her they were my daughter’s glasses and my daughter passed away in November. She replied by saying, “Then you know what the rainbow means.”