Wishing a peaceful Easter to you

I am the resurrection and the life.
Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live,
And everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.
John 11:25-26

On Easter Sunday, Christians around the world celebrate the glorious resurrection of our Lord, Jesus Christ. The promise is an amazing source of energy for Christians, especially for bereaved parents.

If you have a relationship with parents who have lost a child, then you already know that it takes a very long time for them to realize that their child is not going to walk through the door and greet them with “hello,” or join them for celebrations, or wake up in their bedrooms and wish them “Happy Easter.” We have to find strength daily to fight to accept the reality of our new lives—a life that we never would have chosen. Most of us will spend our entire lives trying to do just that.

Before Laura’s sudden death, Fred and I frequented a church outside of our community. No particular reason, we just preferred attending mass there. In November 2008 shortly after Laura died, we went to talk to one of the priest, we were looking for comfort and reassurance that we could survive loosing Laura. At the time, I believe we were looking in the wrong place. We were not ready to hear what he had to say. I wanted someone to wake me and tell me that I was living a horrendous nightmare. I wanted him to tell me to go home and Laura would call me. But of course that is not what he said. His words at the time assaulted my entire being. I wanted to scream at him but I didn’t have the strength. I couldn’t tolerate listening to his Catholic wisdom. He blatantly told us, a mother and father who just lost their daughter, that we should not be grieving for her, after all she is with God now. I hated hearing those words and I was beyond furious and defeated. We wanted Laura home with us (and we still do)! How dare he tell us that we should accept her death? I left that church determined never to go back again.

Now it is March 2010. I have been back to the chapel a couple of times to attend masses that have been dedicated in Laura’s memory. Our lives have moved forward even though we couldn’t imagine that ever happening. The truth is simply we don’t have a choice. We have to find strength and continue to live not only for ourselves but to honor our child’s memory and to share today and tomorrow with all the family and friends that we are blessed to have.

Spring is a new beginning and Easter renews the spirit. When we are ready to reflect on the words “everyone who lives and believes in me will never die,” we will be able to experience some peace and joy despite our pain. These powerful words reminds us that God and our angels are always with us, no matter what our challenges and blessings are.

I have heard your prayer,
I have seen your tears; indeed, I will heal you.
2 Kings 20:5